Painful Awareness

 

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6/6/15 © Deb Correia
Polymyalgia Rheumatica (PMR) or my preferred acronym – Pretty Much Ridiculous – is a recent diagnosis for me. I have spent the past 4 years battling symptoms and trying to determine what was happening to me and now we have a name for it. For those of you who have spent years searching for a medical diagnosis for what plagues you – there is a relief in knowing your symptoms are not all in your head – and collectively they have a name. The relief is short-lived when you hear the words, “we have only one medication for it and we don’t like it.” Those words lack comfort. Please do not misunderstand me – I know that this could be much worse. I recognize and am grateful that it is not a life threatening illness. However, the inabilities are over-riding the abilities and that is frustrating. This awareness is frustrating. Although the medication has improved the symptoms -to some degree- one has to question the trade-offs. PMR has proved to be quite challenging physically which of course plays on the mental aspects of well-being. I have days where the smiles, good humor, and goofiness become weighted down – replaced by pain, fatigue, and a painful awareness of my limitations. I share this in hopes of creating an exchange for people who may also be suffering with this illness or any other illness in which one does not appear to be ill, yet the battle is very real on a day to day basis. Maybe this post will cause someone who is undiagnosed to look up PMR and maybe recognize the symptoms in themselves and be able to present something to their doctor. Please feel free to share your stories. Let’s use technology to help and support one another, providing hope and strength as we go. After months of testing and medication it was determined this was not the correct diagnosis. They have ideas on another one, but more testing before confirmation. A tiring frustrating process.
6/7/15 © Deb Correia (Revised 10/11/15)

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